It’s crazy to think that a year ago, I was the size of a whale – and it’s even crazier to think that in just a couple of weeks, my baby girl will be turning a year old. Where the heck did the last year go?
Here I am, exactly a year ago today, one week from my due date and anxiously waiting to meet my daughter. I was uncomfortable and excited and nervous and tired; I was a giant bundle of nerves, and I had no idea what was in store for me in those following days, weeks, years. I remember when I was a child, all the horror stories I’d heard about the pain of labor, and throughout my teen years, I thought, “That will never be me, I could never put myself through that kind of agony, why do people have children?” And as I got older, that sort of mindset seemed to change, and when I did find myself suddenly pregnant, I remained cautiously optimistic that all those horror stories I’d heard about the pain and the changes my body would go through had been just that: stories. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.
It was, however, even worse than I could have ever imagined. The pain was excruciating, but I survived. (And I owe a great deal of thanks to modern medicine – the epidural was the only thing that kept me going.) It was exciting, though, and at the end of it all, I got to meet my precious bundle of joy. I look back at the photos from her birth now and think about how amazing the female body is; I created a human being, I gave life to this little human being, I brought her into this world. How incredible is that?
My boyfriend swears that there’s this sort of pregnancy amnesia that all women have. They forget about all the bad stuff during labor and remember all the good; I think he’s probably right.
2013 was a great year for us. It had its share of ups and downs, but it was the year that we gave little R to the world, and it’s the year that we officially became a family. I gave birth to the love of my life, I quit my job in retail to work from home as a personal assistant, Mike accepted a job making double what he was making at his previous job. R survived long car rides, a vacation on the beach, and her first round of holidays – and she got to meet her great-great-grandmother!
This past year has reminded me how incredibly lucky I am to have the life I lead. My New Year’s resolutions this year are simple: to keep myself positive, no matter what happens, and to write more. I’m so very excited to see what 2014 will bring. (And if 2014 happens to bring more sleep… I would be so very, very grateful!)